Raising a child is one of the most difficult challenges in a parent’s life. It becomes even more demanding when divorce disrupts family life. Shared custody is one alternative to ensure both parents have the same influence on a child’s development.
More and more children in the Czech Republic are living under shared custody arrangements. Courts are increasingly inclined to allow a child to have two homes, due to not only higher divorce rates but also changing roles for women and men.
In this article, we will look at the advantages and disadvantages of shared custody and how to implement it effectively.
Shared Custody
Shared custody means that a child lives (usually for a longer period) with each parent. It is based on the Convention on the Rights of the Child, which states that every child has the right to the care of their parents. Both parents also have the same responsibility for the development and upbringing of their child. Increased divorce rates in the Czech Republic and the resulting increase in the number of children living solely with their mother led to the introduction of shared custody. The amendment to the law therefore gave fathers the opportunity to participate equally in raising their child.
The time a child spends with each parent under shared custody should be equal or very similar. For younger children, shorter intervals of 2 to 3 days are possible. During these days, at least one short visit from the other parent is recommended to prevent the child from feeling homesick. For older children, the intervals can be longer, even two weeks. However, there are systems where children alternate between their parents monthly or quarterly.
Women have historically been prioritised when it comes to child custody. This was because they were always perceived as the empathetic and caring ones who express their feelings. However, the father’s role is just as important as the mother’s. Therefore, courts are increasingly inclined towards shared custody arrangements.
Shared Custody and Maintenance
Shared custody is often perceived as a way to avoid paying child support. However, the obligation to contribute to a child’s maintenance does not disappear, as it might seem. Parents share the upbringing based on a set schedule, which may not always be divided equally. For example, a child may spend 60% of the time with one parent and 30% with the other. Child support is determined accordingly. The deciding factor is the agreement between the parents or a court decision.
If both parents have similar incomes and share care of the child equally, child support may not be set at all. If one parent’s income significantly exceeds the other’s, the higher-earning parent pays a higher amount of child support. The proportional distribution of childcare is also taken into account.
The deciding factors are the parents’ incomes, the child’s age, and the costs of care. However, court-ordered child support is only a marginal financial flow. Parents must pay so many mandatory expenses that mutual agreement is the most important thing.
Pitfalls
The very idea of shared custody aims to ensure both parents have the same influence on the child’s upbringing.
For post-divorce shared custody to function fully, both parents must cooperate and communicate. Only then will it make sense and have a positive impact on the healthy development of their child. It is important that they agree on consistent parenting. Otherwise, they may create psychological problems for their child that will haunt them throughout their lives. Children need order, control and guidance. When they are therefore between two homes with different rules, their problems can manifest in their lives as various dependencies, antisocial behaviour or aggression.
Many experts dismiss alternating care arrangements due to frequent moves and the resulting loss of a sense of home. Others agree that alternating care ensures both parents are involved in raising the child, taking responsibility for their development, and provides the child with a sense of stability without the absence of a parent. Opinions differ. However, what may help one child can harm another. Therefore, the court should carefully consider what is in the child’s best interest when making decisions. The child’s interest is assessed individually based on family circumstances and the child’s relationship with their parents and grandparents.
School Problems
If the parents live close to each other, the child attends one school. However, a problem can arise when the parents’ residences are far apart and the child must attend two schools. Teachers are among the biggest opponents of alternating care. Often, forgotten supplies, uncompleted homework, and poor preparation for lessons are to blame. Parents who have a child in an alternating care arrangement often do not get along. The cause of the problems is poor communication between parents about the child’s school performance and problems at school.
A court that decides on an alternating care arrangement rarely addresses whether contact with both parents is being maintained. It can therefore happen that a child spends one week with their mother and another week, for example, with their maternal grandmother. This can have a negative impact on the purpose of this model.
Advantages
Alternating care can also be beneficial, but only under well-defined conditions where both parties get along well. The strongest advantage of alternating care is, of course, the relationship with both parents. It also expands the existing family with new members, broadening relationships. Children gain stepsiblings with whom they can form strong bonds. Often, a child who grew up as an only child will gain a sibling and will no longer be alone. New partners of the parents appear, and with them, new grandparents.
Divorce was previously viewed negatively because it severed ties and disrupted contact. Alternating care has given this issue a new dimension. Children can experience their joys and problems with both parents simultaneously.
Divorce often left people feeling lonely. Men were left without children, and women were busy with one-sided upbringing without new partners. Alternating care allows fathers to spend more time with their children and mothers to find time for their personal lives.
Proposal for Alternating Care
This is submitted to the district court where the child has their permanent residence. It must include details about both parents and the child (name, surname, address, birth number, date of birth), a description of the relationships, and the justification for wanting the child in an alternating care arrangement. We should clearly describe what we are asking the court to do. It is necessary to prove that we are capable of caring for the child and securing their financial and educational needs.
Mutual disputes between parents are not grounds for the court to reject the proposal. The same applies to the reason for the large distance between the parents’ homes. On the contrary, the court is more likely to favour alternating care in these cases. Any disagreement from the other parent cannot prevent alternating care. However, it is important that the court orders it based on the mutual will of the parents.
If we want to obtain an alternating care arrangement, we should provide evidence of secure accommodation, their own room, bed, desk, secured school, etc.
The Child’s Interest First and Foremost
Alternating care is considered to be “in the child’s best interest”. The court emphasises that the child should grow up in a peaceful atmosphere of love, happiness, and understanding. However, long-running parental disputes and heightened conflicts are not a solid foundation for full and mutual care.
It is therefore important that parents continue to work together and believe in the effectiveness of this model of child care, even after divorce. If a child is in shared custody by court order and not based on a mutual agreement between parents, instability arises – almost half of children are placed in sole custody within less than two years. A child in shared custody can only thrive when parents respect this model.
Tips for better management
We offer a few tips to make shared custody more effective.
- Consistent parenting approach from both parents,
- mutual tolerance and respect,
- communication regarding upbringing and school education,
- similar routines and rules in both households,
- effort to maintain school attendance in one location,
- clear understanding of the division of costs,
- respect for the importance of the other parent in the child’s life,
- both parents must be convinced of the effectiveness of shared custody.
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